History Bros’ guest this week is the youngest daughter of
the last tsar of Russia, Grand Duchess Anastasia Nikolaevna! Most famously
known for her fictionalized escape by Disney and his goof troop, Anastasia was
just a girl in a teenage wasteland. A Russian teenage wasteland.
This week’s episode is brought to you by the 2004 Honda
Accord. The 2004 Honda Accord, perfect for a teenage girl in an Iraqi war
world. Honda Accord. Safe. Mediocre. Honda Accord. 2004.
Anastasia, take it away:
Hey, old guy, thanks
for…
Whatever.
So, look. Brad said
he’s going to prom with Olga, but I know Brad doesn’t even like Olga. It’s a
just a pity prom invite. Yeah, she blossomed early, but that’s so far gone now.
We’re not still in 7th grade, Olga! Let it go.
Do you have Wifi here?
Doesn’t matter. Turning off wifi and using cellular… Daddyovich is going to be
pissed, but whatever.
Look. Chad likes Olga
and she knows it, but the Brad thing has totally warped her mind. She can’t do
better than Chad. I don’t know if they’ll get married or whatever, but she
can’t do better than Chad. It’s messing with her mind. Stop living in 7th
grade already. It’s so long ago!
And look. Vince has
been giving me eyes during gym. Ew. But I wouldn’t say no. But he’s also in a
friend-zone. Because he fucking likes Olga! And I have to hear about it during
softball. Every. Damn. Day.
Look, Vince, it’s not
7th grade anymore! Olga, it’s our junior year, we’re not kids
anymore. Get over it!
Look, it’s not 7th
grade. Anymore. Carter!
I’m just go alone and
have fun with frooonds. Wish I were dead anyway. I’m gonna haunt the shit outta
Lenin.
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