Clam Chowder with Mussolini

History Bros is back after yet another long break! I took it upon myself to search for the best wings in the country, and guess what, they’re at Hooters.  Hooters: where groping, Florida and 1991 converge! Hooters. Fun fact: I once had the New England clam chowder at a Hooters in Colorado Springs in 2005.  Hooters…people eat soup there. Hooters! Now that that’s out of the way, let’s welcome back a friend of the show – but enemy of the people – Benito Mussolini. We’ll talk about fascism, Rogaine and tea. 1991!

HB: B! Nice to see you again.  Please, indulge in the Bigelow in front of you.

BM: No, grazie.

HB: Nito, if you don’t drink it, the bit doesn’t work.

BM: Espresso?

HB: Take a fucking sip!

BM: Fine!

HB: And…tea with Mussolini!

HB:  Can I have the mug back?  We only have three working mugs.  Nito, why still the fascism?

BM: I like to wear black.  That, and the hat.

HB: Fair enough.  Fascism for fashion. I get it.

BM: You always wear that stickball hat.

HB: Baseball cap…but yeah, I do. It’s because I’m bald.

BM: Ha!

HB: And you forgot you are, too?

BM: Aw.

HB: What did you think you were gonna get out of that, you bully?  Give me that mug back…

BM: 83 percent! 83 percent of men retain or regrow hair! Rogaine lied to me, and now I will crush them!

HB: B, it’s just for the crown – they don’t take into account male pattern baldness. You can’t keep “crushing” people because of your own insecurities.

BM: But they disappoint, d—

HB: Are you crying?

BM: I have gelato in my eye!

HB: You’re so weird.  A first on History Bros: dictator crying!

HB:  Hey, buddy.  You want some soup?

BM: Yes.

HB: Ok, I know a great place that sells soup AND nostalgia!

BM: I like living in the past.

HB: I know you do, B. You like boobies and stickball, yeah?

BM: Yeah.

HB: Hooters! Nito, you can be my creepy uncle who says racist shit at a Hooters at three in the afternoon.

BM: I’d like that.

HB: I know you would. Bye!